Letter from Caroline Youngs Adams, circa 15 January 1843

  • Source Note
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very particular favor to ask, that is that you let no one sea this letter nor let them know the contence [contents], for if it was writen back hear I really do not think I could live through it, I am very willing this letter should be brought forward when the affair is seteled [settled] their, but I intreat of you not to make it bublic [public] for my sake, for I have always idolized my and felt a[s] secure about any sutch thing as <​it was​> possible for any w[o]man to feal, for his example and teaching has always bin as pure as ice in regard to sutch things boath before he come into this Church and sence, and I should have soon expected to see the Eearth assending to the heveens as I should have expected to write write<​n​> sutch a letter as I am now writing, why the Lord sufferd sutch a thing to come upon me I cannot tell I could have born any thing elce better for I have always felt that I could forgive any thing elce in a husband but an affair of this kind, to have bin seperated from him by death I could have born cheafully [cheerfully] in comparason to this and O that he had have died without this shain [stain?] upon his caracter but perhaps it is not so for a fue [few] moment[s] at a time I undulg [indulge?] this pope hope but it soon flys from me and I am left in dispair if he should prove to be inocent it would be the happyest day of my life, if the child is his I think his object in bringing her on hear was, that I would pitty her and adopt the child and the thing be for<​ever​> buried, he new my standing in society was sutc [such] that if I did this that he never would be suspected, but I am a person that never acts hastily in regard to any thing, but he is a diferent turn altogeather, I know his kind benevolen[t] fealing has led him towards individuels has led him grate lengths befor and I think perhaps that is the case now, when he left for he beged me to [be] cherful and happy and said the father of the Child [p. 7]
very particular favor to ask, that is that you let no one sea this letter nor let them know the contence [contents], for if it was writen back hear I really do not think I could live through it, I am very willing this letter should be brought forward when the affair is seteled [settled] their, but I intreat of you not to make it bublic [public] for my sake, for I have always idolized my and felt as secure about any sutch thing as it was possible for any woman to feal, for his example and teaching has always bin as pure as ice in regard to sutch things boath before he come into this Church and sence, and I should have soon expected to see the Eearth assending to the heveens as I should have expected to writen sutch a letter as I am now writing, why the Lord sufferd sutch a thing to come upon me I cannot tell I could have born any thing elce better for I have always felt that I could forgive any thing elce in a husband but an affair of this kind, to have bin seperated from him by death I could have born cheafully [cheerfully] in comparason to this and O that he had have died without this shain [stain] upon his caracter but perhaps it is not so for a fue few moments at a time I undulg [indulge] this hope but it soon flys from me and I am left in dispair if he should prove to be inocent it would be the happyest day of my life, if the child is his I think his object in bringing her on hear was, that I would pitty her and adopt the child and the thing be forever buried, he new my standing in society was sutc [such] that if I did this that he never would be suspected, but I am a person that never acts hastily in regard to any thing, but he is a diferent turn altogeather, I know his kind benevolent fealing towards individuels has led him grate lengths befor and I think perhaps that is the case now, when he left for he beged me to [be] cherful and happy and said the father of the Child [p. 7]
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